Click

I remember when I first moved to SLC.  It took my brain forever to compute the fact that streets that run north and south are called east and west and streets running east and west are called north and south.  It took my brain a very long time for that to finally click, but eventually it did.

I remember when I worked for Il Bagno.  It took my brain forever to compute the fact that a thermostat adjusts the water temperature while the volume control adjusts the amount of water coming out and the diverter switches between the different shower heads.  It took my brain a very long time for that to finally click, but eventually it did.

I am trying to learn how to use my camera.  My brain is taking forever to compute the different settings like aperture settings, depth of field, f/stop, ISO settings, and shutter speeds.  Apparently f/stops are some crazy confusing thing like big number small opening and small number big opening, why do they do this to me?  My brain doesn't work that way and how am I supposed to know if it's a small or large number unless I'm comparing it to something.  Am I supposed to just pull a number out of the air?  This is what I'm going through.

I realize this about myself.  I need a lot of coaching and reminding and explain it to me again.  So when I try to learn something new it takes me FOREVER to get it.  That's why I never want to learn new things, I'm afraid because whoever is teaching me (I'm not very good at learning on my own) always gets frustrated and gives me that look....you know the one...really, you still don't get it?

But I'm trying to move past this fear and put it aside.  I'm not going to give up or worry about what others might think.  I'm just going to keep plunking along and I look forward to the day when the lightbulb turns on and it CLICKS!  It'll happen I know it will.