August 23, 2019

Coincidence or God's Hand?

Do you ever get a random tickle in your throat?  When your throat suddenly dries up and causes violent uncontrolled coughing?  Well, this happens to me on occasion.  Usually in the most inopportune times.

Over the summer, I needed Dallin to mow the lawn before we left on our trip.  He needed to get it done in the morning because it was going to rain in the afternoon and he couldn't do it the next day because we were leaving super early to get ahead of rush hour traffic.  I made it very clear that he needed to get a jump on it before it rained.

I didn't want to harp on him so I let him him-haw around the house for a little bit, trying to let him make decisions on his own.  Finally, right around 11am he headed out to mow and I thought to myself, he's cutting it a little close!

I'm busy getting laundry done, packing bags, getting things squared away for the trip so I'm not really paying attention to what Dallin is doing.  But I notice in passing that he's eating lunch.  Being the optimistic person I try to be I assume he's done mowing and came in for some food.

By this point the clouds have rolled in and it's looking very ominous outside, rain is sure to be here any minute.

As it starts to rain I ask Dallin if he put the lawn mower away? He said no because he wasn't done mowing yet.

WHAT?!?!?!?

Why would he stop mid-mow to come inside and eat and then take so long to eat and goof around that now it's raining and he's lost his window???  Oh yeah, he's 13!

I was livid!!

I was so mad!!

I thought how senseless, how immature!!

I started to rail into him..."I can't believe you didn't finish!!  I specifically told you to mow before..."

And then the tickle came!  I started coughing and sweating and my face turned bright red and not only was I embarrassed I was also so angry at him and there wasn't anything I could do!  I couldn't speak! It was like my whole temper tantrum was just completely cut off in an instant so I ran to my room to avoid more embarrassment and to cool down.

I have thought about this often since this happened.  Was it just a fluke thing that right in that exact moment the tickle came?  Or did God intervene to teach me a lesson?  I guess I'll never really know the answer to that question but does it really matter?  I can just shrug it off and take it as coincidence or I can use it as a learning experience.  I'd like to think that every once in a while God sees a teaching moment and takes advantage of it.

Did it really matter if the lawn was mowed before the trip?  No.  Was it really necessary for me to loose my cool, yell and scream at my child, and in the process withdraw the Spirit from our home?  No!  Have I since yelled at my kids? Yes!  But I am more aware of the effect it has on the people I love the most and how it's truly not an effective way to communicate.

I am grateful for that teaching moment and hopefully I can start to catch myself on my own from yelling at my kids in the future.

No comments: